My Mom Saved My Life …

“When you are a mother you are never really alone in your thoughts. You are connected to your child and to all those who touch your lives. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.”   ~ Sophia Loren

I have always thought of my mom as my hero. She is the strongest woman I know. I have never witnessed a woman overcome so many obstacles and handle life with such grace. She instilled the most valuable life lessons. She is the ultimate survivor!  My mom has always played the hand she was dealt (no matter how crappy it was) without complaining. Her beautiful spirit is unforgettable, and her smile is sure to light up any room. Growing up we didn’t have much, but I never felt like I missed having anything. Her caring, comfort and compassion were much more filling than any material things would have been.  She taught me the importance of being independent and how to be responsible.  I grew up fearless believing I can do anything…

I put off writing this particular post because it is very difficult to share this part of my journey. One week before my surgery, I had to face the most difficult task—telling my mom about my diagnosis. I had avoided it for as long as I could. This was the third attempt at telling her, and I knew it was time to follow through. I knew she would take it hard, and I knew I had to be strong. I found myself worrying more about how my mother was going to handle it than worrying about my surgery. I visit my parents often so my coming over was not unusual. It was before I was getting ready to leave that I announced that I needed to talk to them. I turned the television off and then turned to face my mom and dad. My dad says, “What? You’re not about to say you’re pregnant are you?” We all laughed. He certainly broke the ice. I stayed strong and turned off my emotional side. I just said what I had to say head on. I told them I was diagnosed with breast cancer and it was going to be okay. My mother immediately broke down. There was no consoling her. Her youngest daughter had just told her the news she dreaded the most.  All I could say was it was going to be okay and it really was going to be okay!!  She kept saying that was all she prayed for was her children to be spared from the disease she had battled twice in the past nine years. It took a while, but after convincing my mom to listen I explained to her that I had been going to the doctor and that my surgery was set for the following week.  I told her every detail. I know you may be wondering why I waited to tell Mom. I didn’t want her to worry about the decision I had to make or to fret about the details. I know, from being a mother myself, you always want to make everything better for your children from the moment they are born. I didn’t want to put a burden on her knowing there was nothing she could do to make it better. I feel like she felt as if there were something she could have done to protect me from this ‘monster’ that had chosen to invade my body. When my mom pulled herself together, she gave me a look of amazement and said, “You are so strong. I can’t believe how strong you are.” To that I simply replied, “I got it from you.”

I told my Mom that she had to look at it as if she saved my life. It’s the truth. Had she not gotten breast cancer the second time, I would have never thought about getting a mammogram when I did. My mom spoke with a friend that echoed this very thing. She told her, “I had to go through it a second time to save my baby.” She told me that was when she realized that her prayers had been answered. And I agree they were…

Throughout this journey, I got support from some of the most unexpected places that you would not believe…

(to be continued)